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10Types Laowai in China, which one are you belong to?

Recently I noticed a lot of topics based on materials from other websites. Today I found an interesting one, just for entertainment purpose. Probably it was created by chinese. The original name is "The 10 Types of Laowai in China". So, lets start.

A) "Teacher"
Loser with poor posture, or other marks that signify his inability to get a job in his native country. Obviously looking to sleep with naive Chinese girls. Porn addiction evident. "Teacher" is a byword for "unaccomplished freak with no future." Thinks hoodies are reasonable attire. Wears sandals in the summer time. Is most usually under 5'8" and also has the skinny-fat look, meaning an undeveloped physique and a protruding belly. Enjoys wearing khaki shorts, sandals and old t-shirts or cheap polos during warm weather. Likes holding Chinese girls' hands because they are his first girlfriends.

B) White guilt girl
Most often blonde, usually a little bit fat, usually unattractive. Permanent scowl on her face from 20 years of feminist ideology burned into her brain. Looks five years older than she is from constant drinking and fornication with dark-skinned clubbers. Hates white men, and wants to escape her "small town", quiet, oppressive upbringing by "exploring another culture," i.e., a non-white culture. Views Chinese people and non-whites as entertainment rather than people. Thinks it's clever to post Chinese phrases on her facebook wall. Uses the word "like" a lot. Is smug because she speaks a little Chinese and is "different" from her usually white, racist, Western counterparts. Is in fact White and racist without knowing it. Likes having Chinese girlfriends who she can share her extremist-feminist views with.

C) White guilt guy
The male counterpart to white guilt girl. Interchangeable with "finding himself guy". Sometimes has good job though. Reads a lot about the history of western racism. Doesn't understand the irony of historical white men coming to foreign cultures and viewing them as a spectacle, and then claiming himself not racist while doing the same thing. Thinks living in a crap apartment or hutong makes him "special." Most often rides a bicycle and wears wool penis caps. Probably has a beard, glasses, or a small amount of facial hair. Loves backpacks and sandals. Total douchebag.

D) Finding-Himself Guy
See C). Also extremely irritating. No goals in life. Thinks facial hair makes himself unique. Thinks he's the first white guy to backpack around the world. This has been done for the last 800 years.

E) ABC Banker Douche
One of the most tolerable types. Doesn't engage in obvious miscegenation. Is probably glad to be out of America where Asian men are viewed lower than dirt. Enjoys $300 Montblanc cuff-links and tailored shirts. Generally well educated. Their girlfriends are generally extremely annoying feminist bitches. Goal oriented, thus more easy to tolerate, and less obvious.

F) Bored ABC guys
Realized America sucks because Asian men are treated lower than dirt. They won't admit this though. Generally claim they want to understand their "culture." Came to China and just screw around with different business ideas that won't go anywhere. Most often depressed. The other only tolerable type.

G) ABC girl
Hates China. Doesn't stick around for long. Hates that Chinese men look down on her for being 28, unmarried, and un-fluent in Chinese. Also hates the fact that she's aging pretty quickly. Hates white men-Chinese women pairings. Goes home pretty quickly.

G) Fat White Girl
Either wearing a Disney English uniform, or doing something that nobody understands. Doesn't realize Chinese people find their appearance atrocious. Doesn't understand the term "stereotype".

H) Studied-In-The-West Return-Chinese-Girl
Got an expensive education in the west. Also got gangbanged in her dormitories. Thinks that makes her "open" and "more progressive" than normal Chinese girls. Usually ugly. Spends a lot of time in clubs. Ugly as the result. Hates men.

I) Fat old pervert
Self explanatory.

J) Short pervert
Height deprived. Somehow manages to become Brad Pitt. Obnoxiously short, usually under 5'8".